From Earth to Barcelona
by roboblob
Summary: 9 teens, a married couple, a mad man with a box, self inserts, and crude and pervy humor and language all combine to make this story. Story format for the first and last chapters. Script format is used everywhere else. Episode 1 in a series of 7.
1. Chapter 1: We Just Got a Letter

**Any people in this story who look like people in real life is highly intentional. Anyone who's in this story and in real life, please, don't kill me. Also, this and the last chapter are the only chapters to be written in story format. Everything else is written in script format.  
><strong>

* * *

><p>Date: May 31, 2011<p>

The Andthenmylastname residence, a house you would not expect in Texas if you stereotype. Inside, Taylor Andthenmylastname is tinychatting with Joe, Alex, and Vic. "Taylor, you have mail!" her mom said. "I'll be back my children." she says. "Letter for Joe San Agustin!" said a voice. "I got mail!" Joe said. He runs to the door. "So Vic, how's life?" Alex asks. "Good." she answers. "Don't you think that it's a little weird for the both of them to get a letter at the same time?" "Yeah, but I don't want to think about it."

"You have a letter. A man in a bow-tie put it in the mailbox." Mrs. Andthenmylastname explains as she hands Taylor the letter. "How do you know it's addressed to me? It has no name. Only the number 2." "I don't know. I just thought that you should have it." "Okay then." Taylor walks back to her computer with her unopened letter. Joe is already back and Antonio, Ryan, and Abanoub are over. "So, that's Antonio, that's Ryan, and that's Abanoub. Fellas, meet Alex, Vic, and Boxxy." "I'm not Boxxy!" Taylor yells. "Okay, that's Blondie Carmichael." "Who's Blondie Carmichael?" Abanoub asks. "The blonde one you knucklehead!" Joe gives Abanoub a noogie. "Hey, you can't do that to him!" Antonio said. "Oh yeah?" Joe asked. "Yeah!" "Oh yeah?" "Yeah." "Oh yeah?" Joe twists Antonio's nose. The three get into a slap fight. Ryan breaks the fight and yells, "Hey!" The three ask, "What?" Then, Ryan slaps the three of them. They hear the other 3 laughing. The four stand up and take a bow. "No, but seriously. Who's the blondie?" Abanoub asks. "That's Taylor." Joe answers. "Hey, Joe," Antonio says, "she has the same kind of letter as you." "So she does my little Mexican friend." Joe walks to his computer as Antonio says, "I'm taller and older than you! And I'm Puerto Rican!" "It's okay Antonio." Ryan says. "Everyone thought you were Mexican when they met you."

"What does your letter say?" Joe asks. "I didn't open it yet. Let's open it together!" she answers. "No, that sounds like something a couple or the four of us would do. And you have a boyfriend." "Fine, I'm opening it first." She opens it. "What's it say?" Joe asks. "You open yours first." "Fine, but I have to do the letter song from Blue's Clues." "Just open it!" Vic yells. "The suspense is killing me!" "Fine. We just got a letter. We just got a letter! We just got a letter. I wonder who's it from." He sings. "It has no name." Taylor answers. "It's a letter from the Doctor." Abanoub says. "How do you know?" Ryan asks. "The color of the envelope is TARDIS blue." "Who's the Doctor?" Alex asks. "We'll explain later." Joe says. "Well, mine has a message, a date, a time, and an address."

"Same here." "What does it say?" Alex asks.

_Now, both of you, I know by now that Abanoub has figured out that the letters are from me, but I'll explain how I know later. Anyway, I need you 7 to follow the directions. Go to the airport on the day before, go to the address at the exact time._

_From, the Doctor_

_PS Rory and Amy say hi._

"And the date, address, and time?" Vic asks. Taylor answers, "22/7/11, 76 Totters Lane, and 2:05 PM England Time." "That's weird because my letter says 2:00 PM." "Maybe they come late." Antonio suggests. "Yeah because they were blowing each other." Abanoub says. Joe pushes him off the chair while Taylor says, "Yeah, we just love Vic's dick." Alex and Vic jokingly agree. "He is not good at first impressions." Ryan says. "No he is not." Joe agrees. Everyone starts laughing. "Hold on," Ryan interrupts, "there's another PS. PS, Joe, bring Miguel." "Who's Miguel?" Alex asks. "The guy who stole from my house while I was moving." Joe answers. "You're still friends with him?" Antonio asks. "You have to learn something about me Antonio, I am a very forgiving person. There are a few selective people who I don't forgive." "Hey guys," Abanoub says in pain, "I think I broke my head." "All I did was push you off a chair 1 foot off the ground." Joe says. "Yeah, and if you broke your head, there would be blood everywhere." Ryan adds. "Besides," Antonio begins, "When do you not hit your head anyway?" Abanoub thinks for a bit. "Oh yeah."

"Hey Joe, why don't you ask you-know-who to come with us?" Antonio asks. "I know a lot of people. Who are you speaking of specifically?" Joe sorta answers. "You know." Joe thinks for half a minute. "Ohhh." I don't have her number." "Luckily, I do." Antonio says as he "saves the day." "Text her asking if she wants to go to England with us." Joe imperatives.

After a few minutes, Antonio gets a text back. "What does it say?" Taylor asks as Vic repeatedly calls Alex a f****t. "No, I won't ever go to England with Joe. I'm still trying to shun him, but I've gone soft." Joe sits down and sulks. "She has gone soft on shunning me." "Wow. She really hates you Joe." Antonio says. "Yeah I know." Joe answers. "And I don't know why." "Look on the bright side Blobby." Alex begins. "We're going to England and you'll get to meet us! You don't need a stupid girl to go with you!" "She's actually as smart as me." "You're smart?" Taylor scoffs. "You don't exactly make the right decisions Robo." "You smoke weed." Joe retorts. "Touche." "Weed isn't a drug, man." Abanoub says. "Who makes worse decisions? Me or the guy with the nose that can pop balloons?" Joe asks. Everyone starts laughing. "Hey!" Abanoub cries. "I'm very sensitive about my nose and you know that!" "Hold on wait," Vic interrupts, "Joe, who do you like?" Before he can answer Alex says, "Vic, don't use his real name. It's too simple. Call him Blobby." "Or Robo." Taylor adds. "Shut up you f*g!" Vic yells. "I know who he likes!" Antonio yells. "He likes..."


	2. Chapter 2: TARDIS Spoilers!

(The scene is on a scanner on a very familiar interior. Amy gets mad at the Doctor)

**Amy: Oh come on Doctor! I wanted to know who he liked!**

**Rory: Amy, wanna go to the pool to figure out who he likes?**

**Amy: Why not the library?**

**Rory: We have a library?**

**The Doctor: Yes, third door on the left. The pool's in the library too.  
><strong>

(They leave)

**The Doctor: This is not going according to plan. The person he liked was supposed to accept. Unless, that's part of what happened. But she was still here. Unless, of course!**

(Amy pops her head out)

**Amy: Doctor who are you talking to?**

**Doctor: No one Pond! Just spoiling the story.**

**Amy: Okay.**

(She gets back into the library)

(Rory pops out)

**Rory: Doctor, are you talking about what just happened?  
><strong>

**Doctor: Yes.**

**Rory: How do you think we got them into that mess?**

**Doctor: No idea. I'll explain in the library.  
><strong>


	3. Chapter 3: To the Gate!

(Next scene: Newark Airport)

**Joe: Can you believe it?**

**Miguel: Yeah, we're going to England.**

**Antonio: Plus, our trip was already paid for.**

**Abanoub: I wonder what the Doctor needs.  
><strong>

(Ryan comes out of nowhere)

**Ryan: Guys, the food here is great!**

**Joe: Ooh Taco Party!**

**Abanoub: Taco Lax is better.**

**Miguel: So wait, I'm still confused, is Amy Scottish or British?**

**Antonio: Scottish.**

**Miguel: I can't tell the difference.**

**Antonio: Apparently. Hey, when's our flight?  
><strong>

**Joe: 10:30!**

(Antonio looks at the clock)

**Antonio: It's 10:25!**

**Joe: Crap. Guys, we gotta run!**

**Ryan: But we didn't pay for the**

**Abanoub: You did pay for it to go right?**

**Ryan: Oh yeah. Run!**

(They run for the gate)


	4. Chapter 4: Not Exactly Fit

**Joe: I don't think we'll make it in time!**

**Miguel: Nonsense!**

**Joe: Okay, I don't think I'll make it in time!**

**Miguel: Why?**

**Joe: I'm not exactly, "fit."**

**Abanoub: You can still run fast, now come on!**

**Joe: Yeah but my heart**

**Ryan: Is fine. Come on!**

(They run to the gate. They make it there at 10:28)

**Antonio: Where's Joe?**

(10 yards away, Joe is on the ground. Then a shadow overcasts his fainted body)

**Miguel: Crap, the envelope had our tickets.**

**Antonio: Come on, we gotta get him.**

**Abanoub: No need. I got him on speed dial.**

**Antonio: Oh yeah so do I.**

**Ryan: Me too.**

**Miguel: I got my phone taken away. Uploading YouTube videos costs a lot.**

**Antonio: So you got your phone takem away because of that.**

**Miguel: Yeah.**

**Ryan: Call him already!**

**Abanoub: Don't rush me!**

(He calls him. They hear ringing)

**Person: Hey, lookin for this?**

(The person throws Joe)

**Joe: Owie.**

**Abanoub: Yeah we are. Thanks...I'm sorry what was your name again?**

**Person: I never told you my name.**

**Antonio: Oh I know you.**

**Person: Well he doesn't.**

**Miguel: Well, since you never told us you name, what is it?**

**Person: My name is...**


	5. Chapter 5: Red Herring

**Abanoub: Well come on, spit it out!**

**Person: Gosh, I'm just doing a dramatic pause!**

**Miguel: Yeah man, there always has to be a dramatic pause.**

**Joe: Dramatic pause!**

**Abanoub: Fine, continue.**

**Person: Good. My name is...none of your concern.**

* * *

><p><strong>Possibly the shortest chapter I've ever written. So, in the next chapter, you'll find out the name!<br>**


	6. Chapter 6: Idiots on a Plane

**Abanoub: Nice to meet you Noneofyourconcern.**

**Antonio: No, she means that we don't need to know her name.**

**Hostess: Flight 423 to London, England now boarding. If you want to get to England, you better go fast!**

**Person: Since we're in a hurry, my name is...Becca.**

(Joe gets up from the ground)

**Joe: Ah, Rebecca I'm not gonna reveal your last name. Thank you. Now I suggest we get our seats.**

**Ryan: Dude, we're first class!**

**Becca: So am I!**

**Joe: What are you doing here?**

**Becca: I'll explain later.**

(They run into the plane)

(In the plane, our heroes are enjoying first class. Ryan and Antonio are playing Portal 2, Abanoub is asleep, Miguel is making small talk with Becca, and Joe is getting this all on youtube)

**Miguel: So you got a letter too?**

**Becca: Yeah, except it was addressed to my brother. He didn't want to go so he gave it to me.**

**Miguel: I see.**

**GLaDOS: Nice going Blue! Guess you foiled Orange's plan!**

**Ryan: Shut the f*** up!**

**Antonio: Heheheh she doesn't like you!**

**Abanoub: Zzzzzzz**

**Joe: And Abanoub is snoring. Becca say hi!**

**Becca: No! I can't be on the internet!**

**Joe: Has that ever stopped you before?**

(She punches his shoulder)

**Joe: Owie.**

For the rest of the flight, the 6 eat the rest of Taco Party and Joe orders a second lunch.

**Becca: Why did you order a second lunch?**

**Joe: I'm a very hungry person. You should know that.**

After sharing his lunch and going to the bathroom, Joe joins the rest of the gang in nap time. Then, the pilot's voice is heard on the intercom, which Joe is the first to hear. He wakes everyone up, except Becca.

**Pilot: This is your pilot speaking, we will be landing in Great Britain in about 10 minutes, so please, turn off any electrical devices. Thank you, that is all.**

**Joe: Guys, wake up.**

**Miguel: What?**

**Joe: Didn't you hear what the pilot said?**

**Antonio: Well, if we're just waking up, we wouldn't be asking what he said.**

**Joe: Oh right. He said that we'll be landing in 10 minutes and to turn off any electrical devices.**

**Abanoub: So, how do I turn off my phone?**

**Joe: You press the end call button.**

**Abanoub: I knew that.**

**Joe: Uh-huh.**

**Abanoub: I did! You know, I'm smarter than I appear to be.**

**Joe: Okay, let's go with that.**

**Abanoub: I am! I was at all the honor roll luncheons for being on honor roll!**

**Joe: See, I wouldn't know because I was only in honor roll three times this past year and I only went to two luncheons.**

**Ryan: Hey, Becca is still asleep.**

**Joe: Hey! Heavy sleeper! Wake up!**

(She doesn't budge, so Joe starts poking her elbow)

**Joe: This makes me remember that one time after we went to Metro Fitness that we had to watch the Schindler's List prologue and she fell asleep and it took 3 guys, including me, to wake her up. Sorry, am I rambling?**

**Becca: Yeah you are.**

**Joe: Hey! Wake up and go to sleep! I'm trying to wake you up.**

**Becca: Wake up and go to sleep, okay.**

As such, she goes back to sleep and everyone but Joe facepalms themselves.

**Joe: What?**

Antonio facepalms Joe.

**Antonio: Facepalm!**

**Joe: Oh! Becca wake up!**

**Becca: I was hoping you'd figure it out soon.**

* * *

><p><strong>So, that's it for the plane, and you found out the name. So, up next, Britain.<br>**


	7. Chapter 7: Tourism and 76 Totters Lane

(At Britain, they go to gift shops)

**Joe: How about this hat?**

**Becca: No.**

**Abanoub: You look like a dumbass.**

**Ryan & Antonio: We now present, the Felt Magician!**

**Miguel: Don't you have a hat like that at your house already?**

**Joe: Oh yeah.**

(At Totters Lane, our young teens look around for 76)

**Abanoub: Excuse me Mister...**

**Person: Chesterson. Ian Chesterson.**

**Abanoub: Chesserman, can you locate us to 76 Totters Lane?**

**Chesserman: Oh yes just round the corner and across the street, you'll see a police box. I just came back from there.**

**Miguel: A police box is?**

**Chesterson: Well, back in the day, police boxes were used for a quick arrest and policemen would arrest criminals in hem. Then, they would make a call to the station and they rest of the police would come to get the criminal to jail.**

**Miguel: Thanks for the history lesson, Chesserman.**

**Chesterson: It's Chesterson! Oh I missed that.**

**Ryan: Missed what?**

**Chesterson: I had a friend back in the day. He was the grandfather of a student of mine. He would often mess up my last name. His name was the Doctor.**

(Miguel, Abanoub, and Ryan's eyes widened)

**Becca: Doctor who?**

**Chesterson: Just, the Doctor. Now I got to get back to Barbara. See you lads.**

**Abanoub: Thanks for the info Mr. Chesserman!**

(He walks away)

**Miguel: You're a teacher?**

(Joe and Antonio walk up to them)

**Joe: Who was that?**

**Abanoub: Ian Chesserman.**

**Becca: Chesterson.**

**Abanoub: Whatever.**

**Joe: That name sounds familiar. Oh, now I remember. He was a substitute teacher that my dad had once.**

**Abanoub: How old is your dad?**

**Joe: 40.**

**Becca: He didn't even look old! He looked 30!  
><strong>

**Antonio: Let's just focus on the main reason why we're here. Does he know where 76 Totters Lane is?**

**Miguel: Round the corner and across the street, you'll see a police box.**

(They walk around the corner and see the police box)

**Joe: That's 76 Totters Lane?**

**Ryan: Well he did seem like an eccentric old man.**

**Becca: I doubt that's where we need to go.**

**Joe: I don't know. Something seemes oddly familiar.**

**Abanoub: Joe you got a bug on your back.**

**Joe: Get it off get it off get it off get it off!**

(They keep slapping each other because the bug flew between them. A car passes by and drives into a large puddle next to the sidewalk they're standing at)

**Driver: Chav!**

**Miguel: Asshole!**

**Joe: We're all wet now.**

**Abanoub: Luckily, I had a hat on. What's a chav?**

**Joe: No clue.**

**Antonio: Maybe if that is 76 Totters Lane, it could be a wardrobe.**

**Miguel: Maybe. **

(They walk across the street and knock on the door 4 times)

(The Doctor pops out)

**Doctor: Apples. Anyone want an apple?**

**Becca: Ooh me.**

**Joe: Hello Doctor.**

**Doctor: Ah the young Joseph San Agustin. Oh and he brought friends. Antonio Arce, Ryan Normandia, Abanoub Said, and Miguel Acevedo. How nice of you to see me again. Ah and Rebecca-**

**Becca: Don't say my last name. How do you know me?**

**Doctor: Well after my first encounter with these boys, I watched over them like a guardian angel.**

**Joe: That's not creepy at all.**

**Doctor: Oi! I'm not going to state the real reason why I know.  
><strong>

**Joe: You wanna know something creepy? It's Mothers' Day and your little brother is wearing your mom's new high heels.**

**Abanoub: That actually happened?**

**Joe: Yeah. Now all I can say to that is, Hey Mommy! Lookit me I'm pretty!**

**Antonio: Doctor, do you have a wardrobe in that "house" of yours?**

**Doctor: House? He survived?**

**Antonio: Your living area.**

**Doctor: Oh. Yeah why?**

(They give him a face)

**Doctor: Right you're all dripping wet.**

**Driver: Chavs are everywhere!**

(They turn their heads. Taylor, Vic, and Alex are drenched and across the street)

**Joe: Hey! Over here!**

**Taylor: ROBO!**

**Joe: WHAT?**

(They run up to them and Taylor hugs him)

**Joe: I don't like hugs!**

(She stops)

**Alex: We're all wet.**

**Antonio: Wow Joe. I was right. You are leading an Asian Invasion.**

**Doctor: Hello Ms. Andthenmylastname, Mr. Hunyh, and girl who loves wankers.**

**Alex: Are you a Doctor?**

**Doctor: Yes. Sort of.  
><strong>

(They shake hands)

**Taylor: That's not just any Doctor, Alex. That's The Doctor!**

**Alex & Vic: Doctor who?**

**Taylor & Doctor: Just the Doctor.**

**Doctor: Alright, how do you know who I am?**

(She points to Joe)

**Doctor: Oh right. Come on you chavs! Rory will lead you to the TARDIS wardrobe won't you Rory?**

**Rory: Sure.**

(They walk in)

**Joe: What the hell is a chav?**

* * *

><p>I'm serious. What the hell is a chav?<p> 


	8. Chapter 8: The TARDIS and Barcelona

(Inside, everyone but Miguel, Joe, Abanoub, Antonio, and Ryan are amazed)

**Vic: It's bigger on the inside.**

**Taylor: Just like they say. You can have a party in here.**

**Alex: How are you not affected by this?**

**Doctor: Long story. I'll explain later. Now Rory, Amy-Where's Amy?**

**Rory: She went to her room. Didn't feel too well.**

**Doctor: Well she may be pregnant then. If only I asked Idris that.**

**Rory: Don't you mean, "Sexy"?**

**Doctor: Get them to the wardrobe.**

**Becca: Who's sexy now?**

**Doctor: I'll explain later.**

**Rory: Overusing that phrase Doctor.**

(They walk through the corridors of the TARDIS)

**Becca: What does TARDIS stand for?**

**Rory: Time And Relative Dimension In Space.**

**Becca: Ah.**

(They change into new clothes. Becca wears a white tshirt, tight pants, and a hooded vest. She retains her sneakers though)

**Joe: Hey it's the middle of the summer! Why not wear tight jeans?**

(She punches him and changes into shorts. Joe comes out wearing a green and black hooded shirt, shorts, and fingerless gloves)

**Joe: Good thing no one got their shoes wet. No shoes in there.**

(Antonio sports a similar outfit only the shirt is beige and black)

**Antonio: There's like a ton of these.**

(Ryan wears a similar shirt. Only it's white and black and it has the XBOX symbol)

**Antonio: Where did you find that?**

**Ryan: At the end.**

(Miguel wears a smaller version of the 9th Doctor's clothing)

**Miguel: I look good in leather.**

(Taylor just uses the clothes she packed)

**Abanoub: Maybe we should've packed clothes.**

**Joe: Haven't thought of that.**

**Alex: You're gonna go to England for 2 weeks wearing the same exact clothes?**

**Joe & Abanoub: Yeah.**

**Joe: Well, the same clothes, costumes, and I packed my laptop.**

**Alex: What are the costumes for?**

**Abanoub: We can't tell you. It's classified information.**

**Joe: I'll tell him. You see, if there's a mystery to be solved, we put on the costumes to solve the mystery.**

**Alex: Why do you have to wear costumes?**

**Joe: His idea.**

**Abanoub: I just want to and I made him.  
><strong>

(Vic sports a Zelda shirt and the shorts she was wearing)

**Joe: Majora's Mask is my favorite.**

**Vic: Don't mention that ever! I'm gonna have nightmares about that statue now!**

**Joe: You're welcome.**

(Alex wears the shorts he was wearing and a black and red hooded shirt)

**Joe: Alex, how many times do I have to stress this? Red shirts always die!**

**Rory: Only in Star Trek.**

**Joe: What's your wife's hair color?**

**Rory: Red. What's your point? Oh the fact that I killed her when I didn't want to. Well she wasn't wearing a red shirt!**

(Abanoub comes out wearing the Wyld Stallyns hat he was wearing, a yellow tshirt, a green flannel jacket around his waist, and shorts)

**Abanoub: I am Bill S. Preston Esq!**

(Back in the control room, they all converse with each other)

**Joe: Guys, this is Taylor. She acts like Boxxy. A lot.**

**Taylor: Shut up I don't like to be called Boxxy!**

(She slaps him)

**Joe: Ow. This is Vic. She loves dicks for some reason.**

**Vic: Pen-**

**Joe: This is a PG-13 rated comic.**

**Vic: And I can't say penis?**

**Joe: Nope.**

**Abanoub: So you like dicks?**

(He gives her a smile. Joe slaps the back of his head)

**Abanoub: Ow.**

**Joe: This is Alex. He's Vietnamese and will die soon because of him wearing a red shirt.**

**Alex: I'm not gonna die.**

**Antonio: Like I said, Asian Invasion!**

**Joe: Taylor jokes about how short he is.**

**Taylor: No I don't shut up!**

(She slaps him again)

**Becca: He seems taller than you.**

**Joe: He seems taller than you too.  
><strong>

**Alex: Compared to my friends, I'm like Shorty Rossi.**

(The Doctor, Rory, and Amy greet Taylor, Becca, Vic, and Alex)

**Antonio: I don't get it. You're Asian and Alex says that he's had a few girlfriends and you haven't!**

**Joe: It's because my sarcasm is a turn off, I have acne everywhere, and I don't listen to NeverShoutNever.**

**Antonio: Explains a whole lot.**

(The Doctor looks at Miguel and sees the 9th Doctor)

(The Doctor walks to Miguel)

**Doctor: Miguel?**

**Miguel: Yes?**

**Doctor: Where did you find that outfit?**

**Miguel: In the wardrobe. D'you like it? Leather looks good on me.**

**Doctor: It's just that you're reminding me of one of your past selves.**

**Miguel: The one born into the Time War?**

**Doctor: Yes.**

**Miguel: I'll change into something different if you like.**

**Doctor: No, it's alright.**

**Miguel: K.**

**Amy: Doctor, can you do another scan to see if I'm pregnant? I've been have stomach problems.  
><strong>

**Doctor: Sure.**

(The screen flickers between yes and no)

**Rory: Why don't we use the traditional pregnancy test?**

**Amy: You got money?**

**Rory: So is it a yes or a no to pregnant?**

**Doctor: Not sure. Old girl doesn't even know.**

**Amy: We'll try again tomorrow then.**

**Doctor: Okay. So where do you want to go? Eye of Orion? It's a beautiful place. What about Barcelona? Not the city Barcelona, the planet Barcelona.**

**Rory: There's a planet Barcelona?**

**Doctor: Yeah. Beautiful place.**

**Amy: You know many beautiful places do you Doctor?**

**Doctor: Yes.**

(They fly the TARDIS)

**Joe: I'll never get used to this sound.  
><strong>

**Doctor: I love this sound.**

**Joe: Mein Gott.  
><strong>

(They land on Barceleona)

**Doctor: Grab your cameras boys and girls, this is one place to see. Very beautiful.**

(Joe grabs his camera)

**Joe: Taylor say hi.**

**Taylor: Wazzup peoples!**

**Joe: I iz trollin.**

**Taylor: You is trollin!**

**Joe: You are Boxxy.**

(She punches him)

**Joe: Ow.**

(He turns to Becca)

**Joe: Becca say Hi.  
><strong>

(She puts her hand over the camera)

**Joe: Hey!  
><strong>

(They walk out and Barcelona is left in ruins)

**Amy: Doctor, I thought you said this was a beautiful place.**

**Doctor: Yeah I did didn't I? Well I did say _was_.**

**Rory: Look over there.**

* * *

><p>What did Rory see? I guess you'll have to find out, tomorrow.<p> 


	9. Chapter 9: In Which Joe Knows Too Much

(They turn to see a ship)

**Doctor: Ah. A-**

**Joe: What? Daleks? Cybermen? Atraxi? Raxaoricofallapatorians,more specifically the Slitheen family? Judoon? Hoix? Weevils? Uvodni? Sycorax? Silurians? Autons? Roboform? The actual Nestene Conciousness itself? Chelonians? Drahvins? Zygons? Terileptils? Draconians? Haemogoths? The Terrible Zodin? Omega? Salamander?**

**Doctor: You left out one race that if you said it, you'd be right. It's a Sontaran ship. Becca, feel tall. Sontarans are short compared to humans.**

**Becca: How tall?**

**Doctor: About 1-2 feet shorter than you. San Agustin, feel tall too.**

(Joe stands on his tiptoes)

**Becca: Stand straight.**

**Joe: Yes sir.**

**Abanoub: How do you know all of those alien races?**

**Joe: Long story.  
><strong>

**Miguel: So what do we do now that Barcelona is in ruins?**

**Joe: I suggest we run. Run so far away. Let's run. Let's run all night and day.**

**Doctor: No. Sontarans would make this planet a whole desert. There must be something wrong here.**

**Abanoub: So we just walts in there and find out what's going on?**

**Doctor: No we go into the TARDIS, materialize into the ship for a quicker way, and then walts in and find out what's going on.**

**Abanoub: Okay.**

**Doctor: Alright. Everyone into the TARDIS.**

**Voice: Doctor wait!**

**Doctor: River?**

(River Song runs to the Doctor)

**Doctor: Hello River.**

**River: Hello sweetie.**

**Abanoub: Sweetie? They married?**

**Amy: Not sure, but they do have unsynchronized timelines.  
><strong>

**Doctor: What are you doing here?**

**River: Following your trail.**

**Rory: Why are you doing that?**

**River: Spoilers. I came here and saw all the dead bodies.**

**Doctor: Sontarans don't kill people.**

**River: Let me finish. Then I see the Sontaran ship and ponder about the same thing and then I heard your TARDIS materialize.**

**Doctor: Well that's quite a story Song but if you want to explore more, I suggest you come into the TARDIS.**

**River: What do you think I was going to do? Walk all the way back there?**

**Amy: Don't you have your vortex manipulator?**

**River: Battery's charging.**

**Doctor: It's from the 51st Century! How can the battery be charging?**

**River: When you tamper with 21st Century technology!**

**Doctor: Why were you tampering your Vortex Manipulator with 21st Century technology?**

**River: Why do you tamper with any century technology with that sonic screwdriver of yours?**

**Doctor: Because it's fun.**

**River: Then that's my reason.**

(They walk into the TARDIS)


	10. Chapter 10: Aw, That Was a Plot Twist!

**Doctor: Now, I'm going to try and establish communication with whoever's on board the Sontaran ship. And I have a feeling that it's not Sontarans.**

(He presses colorful buttons on the secondary console until he gets communication)

**Doctor: Come on then, the Doctor will see you now.**

**Voice: What are you doing here?**

**Becca: Doctor what is it?**

**Rory: A terrible army.**

**Doctor: Not as perfect as the Sontarans though.**

**Taylor: Doctor what is it?**

**Amy: Everyone's worst nightmare.**

**Alex: Tell us!**

**River: This is something that they should know Doctor.**

**Miguel: Remember that day when the sky went black even though it was bright as day?**

**Vic: Yeah.**

**Miguel: Well, I went over to Joe's house and he suggested that we contact the Doctor so we emailed him.**

**Amy: You have email and never told us?**

**Doctor: I never used it. Until that day.  
><strong>

**Miguel: Well, he explained that it was a force that shan't take over. He also told us that he didn't know who we were and that we probably met a future incarnation of himself.**

**Joe: That's how I know about all those alien races.  
><strong>

**Vic: Doctor, what is it?**

**Doctor: Daleks.**

**Joe: I knew it!**

**Dalek: Doctor, you never answered my question.**

**Doctor: Well then Sassy, the reason that I'm here is that I was going to take a vacation with my companions, a woman who knows a lot about me, and these young teens.**

**Dalek Sassy: We also have someone who claims to be a companion of yours.**

**Voice: Doctor? Doctor?**

**Doctor: Jamie.**

**Abanoub & Becca: Jamie?**

**Joe: Not the Jamie we know. This Jamie's a male like the Jamie we know's dad.**

**Becca: How do you know that?**

**Joe: Remember in the first few days of health?**

**Becca: No not that, the Jamie on the Sontaran ship!**

**Joe: Well if you listen to the voice.**

**Jamie: Doctor where are you? Where am I?**

**Dalek Sassy: Oi! Scottish skirts!**

**Jamie: Dalek ship. Imprison a McCrimmon will ya? I'll show ye! Creag an turie!**

**Dalek: Don't even try. Look, the Doctor wants to speak with you.**

**Jamie: My Doctor or another Doctor? I've met one before. He helped us not get shot down by the Brtish Army brainwashed by the War Chief.**

**Dalek Sassy: We'll just let you see.**

**Jamie: Fine.**

* * *

><p>And that was my attempt at trying to make a Dalek funny.<p> 


	11. Chapter 11: Dramedy This Way Comes

**Dalek Sassy: He will be with you shortly.**

**Doctor: I thought Daleks didn't have personalities. How come you sound a lot like Donna?**

**Dalek Sassy: Her sass grew on to me.**

**Rory: That's not weird at all.**

(Jamie gets on screen)

**Jamie: Hello Doctor I've never met before.**

**Doctor: James Robert McCrimmon. Nice to see you again.**

**Jamie: Where's my Doctor?**

**Doctor: No idea.**

**Jamie: Well if you're the Doctor, you should be able to remember something like this.**

**Doctor: Yeah I should, but I don't. I believe the Daleks are messing up with the timestream and this meeting was not supposed to happen.**

**Jamie: Oh aye.**

**Amy: You actually get this?**

**Jamie: Nah. When they say stuff like this, it's just best to just act like you follow. Hold on, you're Scottish?**

**Amy: Yeah and I'm married.**

**Jamie: Well Married...**

**Amy: My name is Amelia Pond. I just go by Amy now.**

**Jamie: Well you're definitely not my neighbor Amelia Pond.**

**Doctor: Descendant Jamie.**

**Jamie: What?**

**Doctor: Amelia in your time gave birth to Amy's great-great-great grandfather and now there's Amy right there.**

(The Doctor pulls Rory)

**Doctor: And this is her husband.**

**Jamie: You married him?**

**Doctor: Unfortunately.**

**Rory: Thanks.**

**Doctor: Why didn't you marry the good looking one?**

**Amy: Jeff?**

**Rory: Thanks.**

**Doctor: See Jamie, the TARDIS thinks Rory here is the pretty one.**

**Jamie: How do you know? Did you talk to it and it talked back?**

**Doctor: Yes.**

**Jamie: How?**

**Doctor: I'll tell you later. Now, where were you going with your Doctor?**

**Jamie: We were on our way to meet a Starri or something. He said it was a wee laboratory.**

**Doctor: Dastari's Laboratory, Jamie. Now go on.**

**Jamie: Well, we just dropped Victoria off to study graphology and were about to set off in the TARDIS. I was about to walk in but then a Dalek captured me. You know what? This doesn't look like a Dalek ship at all.**

**Doctor: It's a Sontaran ship.**

**Jamie: A what?**

**Doctor: You'll see later. Now we need to find a way to get you out of here.**

**Dalek Sassy: That's just enough. Go back to your cell.**

**Jamie: Anything to not get exterminated. Come soon Doctor.**

(He gets up and walks away)

**Jamie: Which way is it?**

**Dalek: Follow me.**

**Doctor: Now Sassy, tell me what are Daleks doing on a Sontaran ship?**

**Dalek Sassy: We needed a much bigger ship to conquer this planet. Davros ordered the ruler of Barcelona to surrender and become a Dalek. He refused. So we invaded a Sontaran ship so we could stop them from turning everyone into clones. We exterminated them all.**

**Doctor: Well that's all I needed to hear. So bye!**

(He cuts off communication)

**Joe: What? You're just gonna cut communication off like that?**

**Doctor: Yes. I'm going in there now. No one try to stop me.**

**Joe: Oh hello, I'm the Doctor. Yes I'm here to pick up my companion. Please escort me to his prison cell Sassy.**

**Doctor: Humans.**

(They materialize in board)

**Doctor: Now, we have to walk in there quietly.**

**Joe: Yeah, cause the whirring sound sure is quiet.**

**River: Maybe I should have flown it.**

(They walk out of the TARDIS and a bunch of Daleks are in front of them)

**Doctor: Oh hello, I'm the Doctor. Yes I'm here to pick up my companion. Please escort me to his room.**

**Dalek: Exterminate!**

(It exterminates Alex)

**Joe: I knew it.**

**Alex: It's okay, it only exterminated my hair.**

**Doctor: How do you paralyze hair?**

**Joe: When you flip it and you don't feel your hair flipping.**

**Dalek: Exterminate!**

**Doctor: Nonononono. There won't be any exterminating here. We're just here to pick up Jamie.**

**Joe: Yeah cause that's gonna work.**

**Dalek: Come this way.**

**Joe: And it works.**

(They see Jamie)

**Dalek: You are free.**

**Jamie: Great. Doctor!**

**Abanoub: That's just it? You're letting him go?**

**Dalek: He was unneccasary for the plan.**

**Doctor: Well why don't you just exterminate him?**

**Everyone: Doctor!**

**Sassy: Because, we don't want to mess up the timestream that much.**

(They all walk in the cell)

**Jamie: Now, how's about we get outta here and find my Doctor.**

**Doctor: Agreed.**

(They walk out but the glass cell door closes down. Joe pushes Becca out of harm's way and she ends up outside the cell with the Doctor and Jamie)

**Doctor: Amy! Rory! River!**

**Becca: Joe!**

**Joe: What?**

**Becca: Thanks for saving me but how do you suppose you get yourself out of this?**

**Joe: No clue.**

(The Doctor tries to use his sonic screwdriver but no avail)

**Doctor: Deadlocked.**

**Dalek: They may be unneccasary for the plan but you Doctor are neccasarry.**

**Doctor: When I say run, run. What for?**

**Dalek: To take over this world and make all the exterminated people Daleks, we need you to use your sonic screwdriver to turn the controls into Dalek controls.**

**Doctor: No. Coma along Ponds.**

**Amy: Doctor. We're in here.**

**Doctor: Oh. Kay then. Come along-**

**Becca: Don't say my last name.**

**Doctor: Fine. Come along McCrimmon and little girl. Run!**

(They run to the TARDIS without being exterminated)


	12. Chapter 12: Nonsense

**Jamie: Doctor, where are we going?**

**Doctor: I'm gonna get help.**

**Becca: Oh okay. From who?**

**Doctor: I haven't thought of that.**

(In the TARDIS, Jamie is amazed)

**Jamie: You've redecorated!**

**Doctor: Yes I know.**

(Back in the cell, Joe gets an idea)

**Joe: I got an idea. You know how the door is glass right?**

**Taylor: Yeah.**

**Joe: We could just break through.**

**Taylor: That's great! With what?**

**Joe: Working on that.**

(The TARDIS materializes in the cell)

**Rory: It's the Doctor.**

**Amy: No it's not. Remember this happening?**

**Miguel: What do you mean? It's obviously the Doctor's ship.**

**Rory: Yes but this is a past Doctor.**

**Antonio: How do you know?**

**Amy: Watch and see.**

(The Doctor, Rory, and Amy walk out of the TARDIS)

**Past Doctor: This doesn't look like the Eye of Orion at all. Looks like a Sontaran ship.**

**Joe: Hey Doc, I need to borrow something thanks.**

(Joe runs into the TARDIS and finds a cricket bat. He runs to the cell door and tries to smash the glass)

**Joe: FOR NARNIA!**

(He smashes the bat against the glass but gets electrocuted in the process with no avail)

**Vic: Okay so it's electrocutive.**

**Past Doctor: Why are there two pairs of married couples?**

**Amy: Oh, we're you're future.**

**Rory: And this is where Joe wakes up.**

(Joe wakes up)

**Past Amy: Doctor, how did we get them into this mess?**

**Past Doctor: No idea.**

**Past Rory: Doctor, I thought you said 5 boys. There's 6 boys and 2 girls.**

**Amy: Oi what about us stupid?**

**Past Rory: I'm not counting you two.**

**Rory: Fine.**

**Past Doctor: Yes Joseph, how did we get you into this mess?**

**Joe: Long story and I don't want to reveal anything. No one should know a lot about their own futures. But I'll tell you this, you're part of a plan involving Barcelona. You sent us these three letters.**

(Back in the TARDIS, the Doctor is pondering about what to do)

**Becca: Doctor, I want to go home.**

**Doctor: You want to go home. You want to go home? You're friends, my married companions, and a mysterious woman are in danger and you want to go home? Listen little girl, if we don't find help to get them out of danger, you won't have a home to go to!**

**Jamie: Doctor, calm down.**

**Becca: But we're on Barcelona.**

**Jamie: The city?**

**Becca: No the planet.**

**Doctor: That's just how it starts. They conquer one planet after another and soon, they're gonna reach Earth.**

**Jamie: Again.**

**Becca: Gosh when you were scolding me you made me sound like a harsh person.**

**Doctor: You were harsh. Do you know that the many times you were shunning and being mean to the Asian in green he was feeling sorry for himself? That's why he's such a downer to his parents. His suicide thoughts came back and that's all because of you!**

**Jamie: Doctor...**

**Becca: I didn't know.**

**Doctor: Of course you didn't know! You never knew how bad he felt about it! He doesn't even know why you-**

**Jamie: Doctor...**

**Doctor: Hold on Jamie! He doesn't even know why you do that to him! So Jamie you were saying?**

**Jamie: How are we gonna help them out so this girl and the Joe can make up?**

**Doctor: I still don't know. Well Sexy, who should we go to?**

**Becca: Whoa Doctor.**

**Doctor: Not you! I meant my TARDIS!**

**Becca: You named your TARDIS Sexy?**

**Doctor: Well, she sorta named herself that. I met her as a woman once. We were deep in space and we got a message from The Corsair...**

(In the prison cell...)

**Joe: Tay, do you have your letter?**

**Taylor: Yeah but what about Becca?**

**Vic: She dropped it when you pushed her.**

(Vic holds Becca's letter and hands it to the Doctor)

**Joe: Now deliver these letters to their respective addresses.**

**Past Doctor: There's no address on these, and no message either.**

**Miguel: Oops.**

**Ryan: What do you mean oops?**

**Miguel: I may have erased the addresses so I can write down phone numbers.**

**Abanoub: Why would you do that?**

**Joe: He's not alright in the head. That ginormous head.**

**Taylor: Just write down our addresses, and we'll tell you what the messages were.**

**Joe: My address is...**

(Back in the TARDIS...)

**Jamie: Alright, who is the one person ye trust the most?**

**Doctor: There's a lot of people I put trust in.**

**Jamie: Alright who's the few people ye trust that don't usually travel with ye?**

**Doctor: All the people I trusted were killed in the-**

**Jamie: In the what?**

**Doctor: Nothing, it's a long story.**

(In the Past TARDIS, the Doctor finishes writing the addresses)

**Past Doctor: Now, to avoid any temporal anomolies, I suggest you go back into the cell.**

**Alex: But why?**

**Joe: Well, if we stay in the TARDIS, the universe might implode-**

**Past Doctor: Again.**

**Joe: again and wait what?**

**Past Doctor: Long story anyway, continue.**

**Joe: D'okay.. so if we stay in here, you might meet yourself and we don't want that to happen.**

**Alex: I gotcha.**

**Joe: You don't get me do you?**

**Alex: No.**

(They walk out)

**River: Oh and Doctor, remember this.**

(In the present TARDIS)

**Becca: Wow Doctor, Amy was right.**

**Doctor: What? Amy was right about what?**

**Becca: You are a mad man with a box.**

(The Doctor spazzes out a little)

**Jamie: Doctor what's wrong?**

**Doctor: I just remembered something that River told me.**

**Becca: What was it?**

**Doctor & River: When in danger, lower the shields and call your past selves.**

**Jamie: Oh aye. Wait who's River?**

**Doctor: Long story. Anyway I need to lower the shields and contact my other selves. Contact.**

(The 2nd Doctor, the 9th Doctor, and the 10th Doctor appear)

* * *

><p>Not the best chapter I've ever written. In fact, I think it might be the worst.<p> 


	13. Chapter 13: The Four Doctors

**2nd Doctor: Ah Jamie there you are. I was going to go after the Daleks to get you but the TARDIS wouldn't do anything until now.**

**Jamie: Oh aye.**

**2nd Doctor: Seems you've been redecorating. Hmm don't like it.**

**9th Doctor: I was just about to track the Autons on earth. I located them at a store.**

(10 and 11 look at each other)

**9th Doctor: What? Does something go wrong?**

**10th Doctor: No you just meet a new companion.**

**2nd Doctor: So is this what I succumb to? Travelling with young teenage girls?**

(10 and 11 look at 9)

**9th Doctor: What?**

**Becca: Listen shorty this is my first time meeting the guy!**

**2nd Doctor: I'm just as tall as you!**

**9th Doctor: stop it you two.**

**2nd Doctor: Fine. Now then, who's the latest model?**

(9 and 10 point at 11 and 11 raises his hand)

**2nd Doctor: Bowtie?**

**11th Doctor: Yes bowties are cool. Eleventh incarnation. Tenth regeneration.**

**2nd Doctor: I have to agree with you.**

**10th Doctor: I hate to cut in but 2, you're sounding a lot like the original.**

**Jamie: Must be the gray hair.**

**2nd Doctor: I'm only acting grumpy because I was on a nice vacation with Jamie and Victoria and it's been disturbed.**

**11th Doctor: Alright then. Where are you in your timeline 10?**

**10th Doctor: Well, I'm travelling with a fellow time traveller.**

**9 and 11: Romana survived?**

**10th Doctor: Not her.**

**2nd Doctor: Survived what?**

**9th Doctor: You'll find out in your 8th body.**

**11th Doctor: If you're not travelling with a Time Lord, who are you travelling with?**

**10th Doctor: He'll be materializing shortly.**

(We are greeted with a burst of light and after the light, a figure appears. He's wearing a jean jacket, vest, and anything else that looks like it's from the 80s)

**10th Doctor: Everyone, meet Marty McFly from 1985.**

**Marty: Doc, this doesn't look like 1885.**

**10th Doctor: That's because we're in the TARDIS. This is how it's going to look like in the future.**

**Marty: Who're all these people?**

**10th Doctor: The one with the grey hair is my second incarnation, the one with the leather jacket is my ninth incarnation, and the one with the better bow tie is my eleventh incarnation.**

**Marty: What do you mean incarnations? I thought there was only you.**

**10th Doctor: That's a little hard to explain, really. Oh, I just thought of something.**

(The pinstripe suited fellow puts his hands on the 80s kid's head)

**2nd Doctor: Oh this is going to be painful.**

**Jamie: Doctor, what's going on?**

**2nd Doctor: He's about to prepare a Gallifreyan Mind Meld.**

**Becca: What's a Gallifreyan Mind Meld?**

**9th Doctor: Watch.**

(Ten bangs his head against Marty's and they both scream in pain)

**Marty: Oh, now I get it. You're an alien from way deep in space who has the power to regenerate into different incarnations, which explains their presence.**

**10th Doctor: I also should've mentioned the fact that there are multiple incarnations present, and you know what happens next if we're here too long.**

**Marty: And I can't spoil it for the 2nd incarnation.**

**10th Doctor: Oh and that's Jamie and…**

**Becca: Becca.**

**10th Doctor: Becca.**

**9th Doctor: So, what did you bring us here for? I have Autons to track down.**

**10th Doctor: I have 1885 to go to.**

**2nd Doctor: And I have to go pay a visit to a small laboratory.**

**11th Doctor: Just to speed things up, let's just have the meeting. Contact.**

**2nd Doctor: Contact.**

**9th Doctor: Contact.**

**10th Doctor: Contact.**

(Marty walks to Jamie and Becca)

**Marty: Pleasure to meet you.**

**Jamie: And you.**

**Becca: So, how long have you been travelling with him?**

**Jamie: For as long as I can remember.**

**Marty: I've only met him recently. What are they doing?**

**Becca: Jamie?**

**Jamie: I don't know. This is the first I've seen him do it.**

**Marty: Well, it does look like they're almost done.**

**Becca: Yeah.**

**Jamie: How do you know?**

**Becca: Well, their faces seem to be getting more relaxed, but tense.**

**Marty: It's like waking up from a dream.**

**Jamie: I see. So, they're just contacting each other through a dream? They did say contact after all.**

**Becca: I guess they are. Maybe, they're psychically linked to each other.**

**Marty: They are the same person.**

**Becca: Oh yeah.**

(The Doctors open their eyes and have an adventurous look on each of their faces. Eyes wide and smirking)

**2nd Doctor: Do you think it will work?**

**11th Doctor: It has to.**

**9th Doctor: Come on, let's go. We have to hurry before a Belgium sized black hole.**

**Jamie: A what?**

**2nd Doctor: We'll explain along the way. Now, we must go.**

(He ushers everyone out of the TARDIS)

* * *

><p>Thanks to Doctor McFly for letting me use his crossover fanfiction canon in this story for Marty to appear. And I intended for the 2nd Doctor to be as cranky as the 1st one. He's nearing the regeneration into the 3rd Doctor.<strong><br>**


	14. Chapter 14: Meanwhile in the Prison Cell

An attempt to give the prisoners more lines.

* * *

><p>(Now, while the meeting was going on, the prisoners had to do something to entertain them. Rory and Amy were just discussing on how to get out of here, Miguel was taking a siesta, Antonio was on his PSP and Ryan was on his DS, and Abanoub, Joe, Taylor, Vic, and Alex were discussing on how to entertain everyone)<p>

**Joe: Damn, I can't get a signal.**

**Taylor: Not even from the TARDIS?**

**Joe: I couldn't get a signal from there either.**

**Abanoub: Well, I'm just bored as hell. What do we do?**

**Vic: We could figure out something to entertain ourselves with.**

**Alex: How are we gonna do that?**

**Vic: I don't know.**

(She starts playing with her blue and pink hair)

**Vic: I have blue and pink hair.**

**Joe: Teal and hot pink.**

**Vic: It's faded.**

(Taylor stands up)

**Taylor: I wish I had weed right about now.**

**Joe: Dude, there's nothing to eat. Why do you need weed?**

**Abanoub: Yeah, just try and not do drugs for 2 weeks.**

**Taylor: Fine.**

**Alex: I wish I had my guitar. I could play some thinking music.**

**Joe: You left it in the TARDIS.**

**Alex: Yes, I know Blobby.**

**Taylor: Robo.**

**Alex: Blobby.**

**Abanoub: Why are you calling him those names instead of his real name?**

**Joe: They think Joe is stupid and simple, so they just call me by my username.**

**Abanoub: Of course. Oh, I have an idea. 4 For Texas.**

**Joe: But we don't have a painting.**

**Abanoub: We do have a phone with pictures on it.**

**Joe: Okay then.**

**Taylor: What's 4 For Texas?**

**Joe: A western.**

**Taylor: How come I never heard of it before?**

**Joe: It's from like, the early or late 50s or 60s.**

**Taylor: Of course it is. So, what's the big idea?**

**Abanoub: I'll explain.**

(He stands up)

**Abanoub: Everyone, I have an idea to keep ourselves entertained. Amy, Rory, have you ever heard of the movie 4 For Texas?**

**Amy: Yeah, the Doctor took us to the premiere on our honeymoon.**

**Rory: Really great movie. Good break from all the science. I especially loved the Three Stooges.**

**Taylor: Oh, I see. You're going to do your Stooge antics again.**

**Abanoub: Yeah.**

**Amy: You're going to re-enact the delivery scene? How're you going to do that?**

**Joe: With your help.**

(He stands up)

**Joe: Rory, you're going to play Dean Martin's part and Amy, you're going to play the Anita's part.**

**Abanoub: Taylor and Vic, you're going to be playing the nuns.**

(Antonio and Ryan stand up)

**Antonio: Taylor, you're going to be on a wheelchair and Vic, you'll be pushing it. Ryan, Miguel, and Alex are going to be the guys staring at the painting, which is being played by Joe's phone.**

(Ryan walks to the sleeping Miguel and kicks the leather clad 15 year old)

**Ryan: Wake up.**

**Miguel: You didn't have to wake me up like that.**

**Ryan: Sorry.**

(Ryan takes out his phone and presses it against Miguel and pushes the vibrate button)

**Miguel: I'm up. So, what are we waiting for? Hey, where's River?**

**Joe: Oh, she left. She said that she was going into the future. Well actually, it's her past and our future.**

**Miguel: How did she leave?**

**Antonio: She had this thing around her wrist. It allows her to travel through time and space.**

**Amy: It's a vortex manipulator. The Doctor says it's nasty space-time travel. He's trying to quit it.**

**Rory: How come he's trying to quit it anyway? It's portable and less noticeable than a police box.**

**Voice: Because, it's like a hopper and I have a sports car.**

(The voice belonged to a man with sticky-uppy hair and a blue pinstripe suit. He also wore red converses and similar glasses to Joe)

**Pinstripes: Hello, I'm the Doctor.**

* * *

><p>River's disappearance will be explained in a few more chapters.<p> 


	15. Chapter 15: Escape & Goodbyes

Nearly finished. Yeah, that's all I have to say.**  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Rory: No you're not.<strong>

**Joe: Double negative. Anyway, the Doctor has a lot of hair.**

**Abanoub: And doesn't stick it up.**

**Antonio: He also has a tweed jacket.**

**Miguel: And thin eyebrows.**

**Ryan: He also has boots, not converses.**

**Taylor: And cool jeans.**

**Alex: And suspenders.**

**Vic: And a blue dress shirt.**

**Amy: And a stupid bow tie.**

**Voice: No, they're cool.**

(The voice belonged to the Doctor they knew)

**Doctor: This is my 10th incarnation.**

**Joe: Incarnation?**

**Amy: It's a Time Lord-y thing.**

(The others come)

**2nd Doctor: It's called regeneration, my dear.**

**Amy: Yeah, that.**

**Rory: Doctor, who are all these people, aside from Jamie, Becca, and…**

**Joe: Oh my God it's Marty McFly!**

**Abanoub: The musician?**

**Joe: No, the time traveler.**

(He retorted in a sarcastic tone)

**Marty: How did you know I was a time traveler?**

**Joe: I was being sarcastic, and I think it was a lucky guess. Anyway, you time traveling must be the reason why you mysteriously disappeared all those years ago, along with Jennifer and Doc Brown.**

**Marty: What do you mean mysteriously disappeared? I know about Doc. Jennifer's situation is a bit hard to explain though. But wait, I do get back to my own time, do I Doc?**

**10th Doctor: Of course you do! I even told you that once Jennifer is done and we find Emmett Brown that you'll be back home.**

**Marty: Then, why do they say that I mysteriously disappeared?**

**10th Doctor: I would know the answer, but this one can't remember.**

(He points to 11)

**11th Doctor: Can we just focus on why we're here?**

**Rory: Doctor, who are these people?**

**11th Doctor: Oh, they're all me. Except, you know. Jamie, Becca, and Marty.**

**Becca: Oh, and that's my first reason.**

(She points at Joe while talking to the 9th and 2nd Doctors)

**Joe: I'm your reason for what?**

**2nd Doctor: She was just explaining why she understood that the universe will implode if we don't hurry until a Belgium sized black hole.**

**9th Doctor: She says she's encountered a lot of science fiction, and one of those reasons is you.**

**Joe: You never mentioned any reasons.**

**11th Doctor: This is no time for bickering. We're only….**

(He checks his watch)

**11th Doctor: 5 minutes to Belgium.**

**Joe: Well, we have to get out of here.**

(Joe runs to get out but gets electrocuted by the glass door. Everyone reacts by saying…)

**Everyone: Oh God.**

(Joe gets up)

**Joe: Sorry, I forgot.**

**2nd Doctor: That was a massive amount of electricity! How are you still alive?**

(Jamie walks to the door lock controls)

**Jamie: It's not set to kill. Only stun.**

**Abanoub: That explains a whole lot.**

**Rory: So how are you going to get us out of here? It's dead locked, remember?**

**11th Doctor: Rory, you see, now that there are more Doctors,**

**10th Doctor: That means more sonic screwdrivers.**

**9th Doctor: We're going to use them to override the deadlock.**

(They take out their sonic screwdrivers, press the button on them and override the deadlock)

**2nd Doctor: And now, we wait.**

(The door then slides open and the companions step out. They then hear Staal's voice)

**Staal: Prisoner has escaped. Preparing mini explosive in 10…**

**10th Doctor: I thought you said Daleks were on this ship.**

**11th Doctor: They are, here they come.**

**Staal: 6…**

(2 Daleks appear)

**Dalek 1: Come back prisoner or you shall be exterminated.**

**2nd Doctor: Run!**

(They start to run, but Antonio drops his PSP)

**Vic: I'll get it.**

**Alex: Vic no!**

(She runs into the cell with the PSP and the Daleks go in after her)

**Dalek 2: Exterminate!**

(She runs out and tries to close the door, but no avail. The Daleks have already launched their exterminating ray, which is bouncing along the prison walls)

**Vic: Go!**

**Staal: 3….**

(They run while Vic tries to close the door. Giving up, she runs too)

**Staal: 1…0.**

**Dalek 1: Bugger.**

(The mini explosion and the Dalek exterminating ray combined and made a less mini explosion. It's only strong enough to blow a hole in the wall that Vic was flung through and was knocked out in. The Doctors and the Companions find her and Antonio's PSP, grab them and run back to the TARDIS)

**Staal: More prisoners have escaped. Readying self destruct in 2 minutes.**

(In the TARDIS, the Doctors are going to be sent back to their respective times)

**11th Doctor: She'll be alright in a few days. Now, time to send you two back home to get to the Kars and Reimer experiments.**

**2nd Doctor: Well, it was nice knowing you all.**

**Jamie: Goodbye everyone.**

(They fade away)

**Becca: He grew on me.**

**10th Doctor: He didn't even get to play the recorder.**

**9th Doctor: Well, I have to track some Autons now. Nice to meet everyone. Fantastic, short experience.  
><strong>

(He grins as he looks around the TARDIS)

**9th Doctor: I like it.**

**11th Doctor: Me too. Okay, back to your TARDIS, and tracking down Autons.**

**Marty: And, back to Rose.**

**9th Doctor: Who?**

(He fades away before he could get his answer)

**10th Doctor: I met her while I was at the department store, not while in the TARDIS.**

**Marty: Oops.**

**11th Doctor: Well, now you two have to go to 1885 to track down Doc Brown. So, I guess this is goodbye.**

**10th Doctor: Goodbye everyone.**

**Marty: Bye then. Nice meeting you all, hope to see you in the future.**

**10th Doctor: Well, your future, their present.**

**Marty: What?**

**10th Doctor: I'll explain later.**

(They both fade away)

**Doctor: Now, we can't be here for long. So, where should we go? The Eye of Orion finally?**

**Amy: Sure, why not? We've never been there.**

**Rory: You did say it was peaceful and quiet like Upper Leadworth.**

**Doctor: That was a dream Rory and the Eye is a little bit noisier than Upper Leadworth. They're here.**

(He points at Antonio, Ryan, Taylor, Alex, Miguel, Abanoub, and Joe)

**Joe: Hey Doctor, do you have a painting we could borrow? Like a painting the size of the one in 4 For Texas?**

**Doctor: Maybe one of Turlough's paintings will do. Make a left, then a right, then go up, and his art gallery will be on the door to your left.**

**Joe: Uhhhhh.**

**Doctor: Why do you need it anyway?**

**Rory: They're going to re-enact the delivery scene.**

**Doctor: With the Three Stooges?**

**Rory: Yeah.**

**Amy: They're really nice people. We met them. They said that they knew you but realized that you hadn't met them yet.  
><strong>

**Doctor: Timey Wimey. Where was I?**

**Rory: Having a chat with Frank Sinatra.**

* * *

><p>2 more chapters to go!<strong><br>**


	16. Chapter 16: 4 For Texas

(The TARDIS is now parked on the Eye of Orion. Joe's camera is on a tripod in front of River and the Doctor, who explains what had happened while the others re-enact the scene. Miguel takes Vic's place and Becca is in the TARDIS watching over Vic.)

**Doctor: And you told me to call my other selves, I did, we got out of that place, and here we are.**

**River: That's an interesting adventure Doctor. Now, I'm going to go make it happen. Goodbye Doctor. See you soon.**

**Doctor: River, who are you?**

**River: Spoilers.**

(She disappears and the Doctor watches the scene)

**Joe: Hey! Who pays the $2?**

(Joe, Abanoub, and Antonio are carrying a painting to Amy and Rory while Ryan is in the background)

**Rory: What $2?**

**Joe: Take it easy with the picture now boys, easy.**

**Antonio: Now be serious fellas. We gotta find out if the picture belongs to her.**

**Joe: You must be Miss Maxine! The storage company sent us over to deliver your picture!**

**Rory: What makes you so sure it's her?**

**Joe: Oh, it's her alright!**

(Abanoub looks at the painting)

**Abanoub: Are you kidding? There can't be any doubt Mister. Come take a look.**

(Rory walks to the painting and looks at it)

**Joe: You guys recede!**

**Ryan: You figure she really posed for that?**

**Amy: Yes. That's me.**

**Rory: Yeah.**

(Everyone starts laughing)

**Joe: He did it from memory.**

**Rory: Yeah, that's her.**

(He walks back to Amy)

**Amy: This was the only thing my husband left me. He was a...collector of art.**

**Rory: It's a shame he didn't leave any clothes to go with it.**

(Everyone laughs harder)

**Joe: So, who pays us the $2?**

**Amy: I do, as soon as you hang it up in the bar at the main saloon. Up the gang plank to starboard.**

**Joe: Yes ma'am.**

**Abanoub: Right.**

(They are about to lift up the painting until Joe intervenes)

**Joe: Hey hey hey. Starboard on the boat is to the right!**

**Abanoub: That's where I'm goin'!**

**Joe: Now look, when I say go, we both point to the right. Go!**

(They both point to their respective rights and everyone laughs. Joe switches sides with Abanoub)

**Joe: I'll do it so even you can understand. Now go!**

(They point to their respective rights again and everyone laughs harder)

**Joe: Curly Joe.**

(Antonio walks next to Abanoub and Joe)**  
><strong>

**Anotnio: What?**

**Joe: This guy's a nitwit.**

**Antonio: He's stupid.**

**Joe: Yeah. Now, when I say go, we all point to the right. Go!**

(They all point to their respective rights and everyone else laughs harder)

**Joe: Captain, could you help me here? I'm dealing with two mental midgets here.**

(Rory walks to the opposite side of Anotnio)

**Rory: Alright.**

**Joe: Now, when I say go, we'll all point to the right! Go!**

(They all point to their respective rights and then Rory slaps the three o: She ref them. Everybody laughs harder as Rory points to a direction)

**Rory: Go!**

**Miguel: There they are!**

**Taylor: There, there, there they are, sister!**

(Miguel and Taylor are both in nun costumes. Taylor is on a wheelchair and has an umbrella)

**Miguel: Get them! Hit them!**

(Taylor repeatedly hits Joe on the head with an umbrella)

**Joe: Stop beating up my mane! Why you!**

**Abanoub: Wait a minute, leave her alone!**

(Taylor puts the umbrella down)

**Abanoub: She reminds me of my mother!**

**Antonio: We didn't mean any harm!**

(Miguel slaps the three of them)

**Abanoub: I told you she reminds me of my mother!**

**Joe: You never had a mother.**

**Antonio: Shame on you!**

**Joe: Remind me to have you stuffed!**

**Taylor: That picture is a disgrace to Galveston!**

**Miguel: You're not going to hang that disgraceful picture!**

(Miguel runs to Rory and Amy while Taylor starts repeatedly hitting Joe on the head with the umbrella)

**Joe: GET YOUR MOTHER OUTTA HERE, WHISTLER!**

(Antonio and Abanoub push the wheelchair away while Taylor continues to hit them with the umbrella. They hit a rock and Taylor falls out of the wheelchair)

**Miguel: Get her back in that chair!**

**Joe: Take it easy now.**

(Miguel runs to them to help)

**Joe: She'll be all right.**

(They get Taylor back in the wheelchair)

**Abanoub: Are you all right mother?**

**Taylor: You'll be all right!**

(She strikes Antonio with the umbrella)

**Joe: Just a minute! You just struck one of the toughest men from the state of...**

(Abanoub and Joe both clap their hands four times)

**Joe: Texas! Tell her Tex!**

**Antonio: Well...**

(Antonio walks to Taylor giving her the index finger)

**Taylor: Oh did I?**

(She strikes him again)

**Joe: Maybe you don't understand! He's the toughest man from the state of...**

(Abanoub and Joe both clap their hands four times again)

**Joe: Texas! Give her an adjective!**

(Antonio walks over to Taylor again and hse strikes him with the umbrella, again)

**Joe: Wait a minute! Ruff!**

(Taylor barks like a bulldog or a pitbull and Joe, Abanoub, and Antonio run away, leaving everyone laughing)**  
><strong>


	17. Chapter 17: The Cake is a Lie

Vic woke up in her bed. She was in her room and no one else was there. _Was it all a dream? Was all of this adventure just a dream?_ She gets out of bed and sees her injuries. _What?_ She turns around to see a door shaped like a hexagon. The same door shape the corridors have. _No. It wasn't a dream. How do I open this?_ "Oh my God! How do I open this? Ow!" Her injuries keep her from yelling. _Maybe I shouldn't yell for a while._ She opens the door. "There we go." She walks out and travels the hallways. _What happened? Why am I hurt? Why are there burn marks and lots of gauze? Why am I acting like Joe and asking why?_ While she is pondering about, she gets lost. "Crap. Now, how am I supposed to find a way to the console room?" She walks a bit further and sees a dog. He is snow white and really small, but big. _Is that a Maltese? No wait, it's a Bichon. Joe has that kind of dog. Is that his dog? I think it is. What was his name? Snoopy? Krypto? Snowball? Chewbacca? Oh, now I remember._

"Duke." She calls. The dog barks at her and walks away. She follows him. _Where is he going? _"Duke, come here! Ow." She catches up with the dog who runs away this time. She runs after him and when she catches up to him, this time, he doesn't go away. They are standing in front of a wall. Or is it a door? "Why did you bring me here?" she asks the dog. The wall slides open to reveal that it's actually a door. The door leads to the console room. She can tell as she sees the bright orange, the glass thing that probably makes the sound or is the engine. _I don't know. What is it for anyway? _She sees the lights further brightening the orange glow of the console room and more importantly she can see the Doctor, Amy, Rory, Alex, Taylor, Antonio, Ryan, Abanoub, and Duke. _Duke? How did he?_ She looks to her right. The dog isn't there. _How come I didn't notice that? Oh, that's right, I was admiring the beauty of the console room_. She walks down the stairs and joins everyone in a hugfest. "Where's Joe and Becca?" she asks. "Making a desert buffet." The Doctor answers.

"We better help." Antonio says. Alex, Taylor, Antonio, Abanoub, and Ryan walk to the kitchen. "Where did Miguel go and why is Joe's dog here?" "Well, Miguel felt that he wouldn't be doing much so we dropped him off at his house." Rory answers. "And Duke is here because Joe wanted to see his dog again. When we got to his house, the dog ran in here, again and that's when Miguel wanted to go home." Amy continues. "We're still at his house. He wants to join us for the buffet so he asked for us to wait for him." "Of course. Wait, what do you mean by the dog ran in here again?" "Well," the Doctor begins, "when Amy and I first met the boys, they were hanging around a beach and the dog ran into the Cloister Room. I won't explain much because of the wibbly wobbly-ness." "The what?" Vic asks. "Just go with it." Rory answers.

That's when Alex & Taylor appear with pie stains on their clothes. "Yeah, there's not going to be any pies here." Alex says. "Why?" Amy asks. "Let's just say that they got a little Stoogey again." Taylor answers. The others come with many pie stains on their clothes while Joe has pie on his face. "I am Pieman! Evil ruler of the Order of the Pienex! Fear me!" Joe says. "Can it Harry Potter." Becca retorts. "Clean yourselves up." The Doctor orders. "Yes sir!" The boys say as they march to the wardrobe. "Okay." The girls say as they follow. Miguel walks in and has cake with him. "Maybe one last trip won't hurt." he says. "That's great! Everyone is changing into new clothes, Vic just woke up, and ooh cake!" The Doctor explains. "The cake is a lie." Vic says. "You've been playing too much Portal." Miguel answers back. "Let's wait for everyone else so we can eat the cake." Amy suggests.

Minutes later, everyone is in the console room waiting for the Doctor to find the cake knife. "Found it!" he exclaims. "Yay! Now we can eat cake!" Joe yells. The Doctor opens the cake box and as he is about to finish cutting the slice, a gun pops out. "See, the cake is a lie!" Vic cries. "Miguel, who did you get this cake from?" The Doctor asks. "I don't know. It just appeared on my doorstep when I walked out. I thought you gave it to me." Miguel answers. "Why would he give you a cake to bring into the TARDIS?" Joe asks. Miguel shrugs and the cake shoots an electric ball at Joe. Joe gets electrocuted. Again. "Okay, so it's an electric gun." Rory observes. Joe gets up and bangs his head on the bottom of the console. "Ow!" He gets up again, this time carefully, and asks, "How many times am I going to be electrocuted?" The gun shoots the console and the TARDIS shakes like there's an earthquake and everyone holds onto the railings. The Doctor uses his sonic screwdriver to scan the console. "It's locked!" he yells. "Well, if it's not deadlocked, wouldn't you be able to unlock it?" Rory asks. "This lock is like you forgot your keys inside the house and you have no spare. No wat, hang on. It's just like alock if you can't log in to a public computer." The Doctor answers.

"Well, that's good. Locks only last about 10-15 minutes." Joe reminds everyone. "No, it's bad." The Doctor says. "Why?" Joe asks. "Time isn't in control inside a TARDIS, so we have no idea how long 15 minutes is." Amy answers. "Oh." Joe says. "Well, in the meantime of this lock," The Doctor starts, "say weeeeeeeeeee!' Everybody screams. Even Joe, who would be the one to say "weeeeeeeeeeee" is screaming his normal scream. A 7 year old girl scream is Joe's scream. "This is worse than Nitro!" Joe yells. "Hey, if you die again, can I have your money?" Abanoub asks. "Shut up we're all gonna die!" Everybody screams. They continuously scream their heads off as the TARDIS spins out of control in the Time Vortex.

* * *

><p>Don't you think that that was a great way to end the story? I did. What happens next? Find out in the next episode!<p>

Next Episode: Orbit._  
><em>


End file.
